How To Persuade Anyone To Your Way Of Thinking

Introduction

Discover the 5 trigger points of getting people to believe and buy in to your way of thinking. Whether you are writing advertising copy, starting a cult (ha!) or simply wanting to influence others, these trigger points are worth vaults full of gold in persuading people to your viewpoint and getting them to follow you.

Step One

Learn this mnemonic. You know what a mnemonic is right? You know. Those little phrases like 'Every Good Boy Does Fine Always' that your middle school music teacher taught in learning the lines and spaces on the treble clef. Well, even if you didn't learn that then, learn this now.

Every Joker Asks Crazy Hows. Stay with me. Trust me on this. Learn this crazy phrase. Its going to help you live the life you've always dreamed of living, confirm what you always suspected about people, help you win in all your arguments and let you know that you were right all along. Read on.

Step Two

O.k. The first trigger point for influencing others and getting them to see your way of thinking is,

"Encourage their dreams"

Every person in the free world has some concept of the 'American dream'. Even if they live in France (O.k., it might be the French dream but its the idea that counts; not the country). I believe that everyone is born with this innate desire to be, do and have more in their lives. Its in our DNA.

Western civilization engenders and encourages this. Few people get any encouragement to pursue and live their dreams. They look for it from their parents and are usually disappointed. They then look for it in other authority figures such as ministers, teachers, friends and significant love interests in their lives. Again, they find few, if any, to do this.

The fact remains that we are not advanced in our social and psychological maturity, as a society, to be at a level to encourage others to pursue their heartfelt passions in life.

People will love you when you tell them powerful positive things about themselves and encourage them to live out the life of their dreams. Mae West said, 'Flattery will get you nowhere. But please, flatter me, flatter me, flatter me anyway.'

Step Three

The second trigger point in influencing others and persuading them to see things your way and to like you is,

"Justify Their Failures"

People want to be credited with at least trying.

There is some amazing quirk in most people's thinking that causes them to do anything NOT to look stupid or wrong about ANYTHING.

A friend of mine longed to start his own business for two decades. He didn't do it because 'he was afraid of how he would look if he failed.'

One of my mentors from afar is Tony Robbins. Tony says that its a good thing that when we were toddlers, learning to walk, that we didn't feel this way. The first time that you fell down, you would never get back up and try again. So rather than look stupid, falling down, we would just sit there and NEVER WALK.

I have found that it is actually empowering for people when you help them justify their failures. The memory of a failure can haunt someone and paralyze them from every trying anything again. It can kill their dreams.

We aren't given a 'How To Live Your Life Manual' in school. We were taught WHAT to think but not HOW to think. Especially when it came to the issues of living life successfully and fulfilling.

People want to know that, 'It's not YOUR fault.' The ancient proverb says, "You are destroyed for a lack of knowledge." The truth is, even if you believe in reincarnation, we still don't know how to live our lives in a prescribed, successful way. So, you were never taught how to do everything. It's not your fault.

A warning here. Don't allow people to stay in a mode of fixing blame on others. Just simply let them know that whatever shortcomings they experienced in their lives that, 'You did the best you could at the time. Had you known XYZ, then you would have done things differently.'

Step Four

The third trigger point for influencing people is,

"Allay Their Fears"

If you are writing advertising copy, let people know that 'Joe and Susie Normal' accomplished something that they never knew that they could AND, YOU CAN TOO. This is a powerful persuader.

When you can effectively take others' fears away, they will listen to you and pay close attention to whatever else you have to say.

I remember taking my 15 year old daughter out to teach her to drive a car. We went down below an old overpass where I knew there wasn't any traffic. He fear was so strong in driving a car, she constantly said to me, "Dad, I can't do this. I'll never be able to do this."

I simply got her to drive in figure 8s until she got that feel of driving. Of course, I prayed a lot too :). Anyway, I kept telling her, "Honey, you are going to do fine. You'll be a great driver." She kept resisting my encouragement, but she did learn how to drive.

One of the best ways to 'allay someone's fear' is to demonstrate for them how to do whatever it is that they're afraid of. Even better still, 'put them in the driver's seat' and let them do it themselves. Let's leave that instruction for another day. Just become aware of how you can 'allay others' fears.'

Step Five

The next trigger point in persuading people to your way of thinking, is,

"Confirm their suspicions"

There is a god-like emotion that we feel in the human psyche when we experience those, "I knew I was right" moments. This emotion resides somewhere close to the emotion that doesn't want to be wrong about anything.

I'll never forget the movie 'Wall Street' with Charlie Sheen and Michael Douglas. Sheen was an up and coming stock broker at a large firm in New York City. Through the help of 'Gordon Gecko', played by Douglas, he became a highly successful broker.

The day that Sheen's character was being promoted and moved into a corner office, all to himself, one of the older brokers said, "I spotted that boy the day he walked in here. I knew he was special and would quickly become a powerful force in this business."

Well, near the end of the movie when the Securities and Exchange Commission came into arrest Sheen's character for the illegal trades that he had made with Gecko, Douglas' character, this same older broker was standing there and said, "I knew that boy was bad the first time I laid eyes on him."

The fact is, we don't want to be wrong.

The lesson here is, 'help others in confirming their suspicions.'

I leave the details of learning to do this for another day and another article. But learn to 'confirm others' suspicions'. You will certainly endear them to you when you do this.

Step Six

The last trigger point in influencing and/or persuading others is,

"Help them throw rocks at their enemies"

Again, there is something in our psyche that unites us with others when we discover that we have a common enemy. Now that common enemy doesn't have to be a human being. It could be an inanimate object. It could be a political ideology. In a spiritual or religious sense, it could be an evil entity.

In my business, I provide people with solutions to seeking their own success and living their dreams. The first trigger point is a no-brainer for me. I love encouraging others dreams. However when it comes to this trigger point, I simply join my reader in her/his mind in throwing rocks at 'all those people who said you couldn't do it. All those folks who said you'd never make it.' I don't know who 'all those folks' are and it doesn't matter that I don't know their names. That's not important. What is important is that I'm on the same page, the same team as my reader. And I'm helping them prove that they too are champions by taking shots at their opposition.

* These trigger points are extremely powerful. Learn them. Learn the mnemonic that I taught you at the beginning. I like to say it this way; 'adopt it and adapt it.' Own these five points and make them part of your automatic thinking in relationships with others and however else you want to apply them.

* One last thing. Use combinations of these to make it even more powerful. You will see that you will achieve your desired goal when you do it.

* Warning: Don't use these trigger points to manipulate people. They can be used effectively for the wrong purposes. Use them to help others. Use them for positive and worthwhile intents.