A Pithy Quote About Fear

"Fear is that little darkroom where negatives are developed."... Michael Pritchard.

Clever; and, isn't it the truth? Fear has one good purpose and that is to motivate us to save our lives and avoid real danger. But we have turned it into something else, and use it as an all-purpose way to avoid or limit our lives, sort of like the father in "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" used Windex to fix everything. Most of what we fear never happens. The things that happen, we usually never expected, so didn't have time to be fearful about them.

Children are taught certain fears (I'm not referring to teaching them protective cautions). I watched a toddler approach a battery-operated car, eager to sit in that lime-green plastic wonder. As she was about to climb into it, her mother asked, "Do you want to ride that or are you afraid of it?" The excited child, hand still on the little car, burst into tears and ran to her mother. Adults pose a similar question to themselves: "Do you want to do this or are you afraid?" Rational fears can save lives. Irrational fears impact how we experience life.

Fear often stems from feeling out of control. We can't control everything in our lives because we belong to a bigger picture; but we really do control a great deal of it. We especially can control ourselves and our responses and actions. And what does someone fearful usually do? They attempt to control events and people so they can eliminate the fear.

A familiar quote says, "A coward dies a thousand deaths, a brave man dies but once." We know that courage is not an absence of fear, but moving forward in spite of it. Back to the first quote, how many negatives are created around an irrational or non-serving fear? What does fear contribute to your life and the lives of those you share it with? What would you rather contribute instead? Fear can be examined and worked through, but you have to want better outcomes more than you are willing to settle for less. Are you really "safe and secure" if you're always guided by your fears?

If you want a more positive experience of life, ask yourself some questions about your own fears, such as: How does this serve me? What's the worst that can happen? What do I want more, to attempt and risk possible, but not guaranteed failure or never attempt something I really want and live with regret?

A life rich with experiences or regrets? Hmmm... Which one do you prefer?